You Write Such Pretty Words, But Life’s No Story Book.

I wish my thoughts wouldn’t always eat me alive. They seem to be more powerful than even I am aware of. I always seem to catch myself thinking about one thing in particular, a human. Just one human, one person. I can’t figure out. I seem to be drawn to this human but I’m not sure what it means. Is it good? Is it normal? Is it safe… I’ve always thought that falling for someone could never be a safe thing. Trusting someone can’t be safe… can it? It all seems to over whelming. To rediculous to even consider.

And yet I continue to wonder to myself, what if things were different? What if this person had never been in my life in the first place? Would i be okay with that? I’ve decided that most things happen for a reason and most people come into your life to introduce you to new things. To help you be more like you. But who’s to tell if this person was meant to come into my life and then leave again. Her leaving would traumatize me. It would leave me on the floor. So it brings me back to the same question… is caring about someone this much, safe? So as of right now I sit staring at a blank wall. Just sitting and staring with nothing but to much to think about.

I picked you out of a crowd and talked to you

I said I liked your shoes

You said, "Thanks, can I follow you?"

So it's up the stairs and out of view

No prying eyes I poured some wine

I asked your name, you asked the time

Now it's two o'clock

The club is closed

We're up the block

Your hands on me; Pressing hard against your jeans

Your tongue in my mouth, trying to keep the words from coming out

You didn't care to know who else may have been you before

I want a lover I don't have to love

I want a girl who's too sad to give a fuck

Where's the kid with the chemicals?

I thought he said to meet him here but I'm not sure

I've got the money if you've got the time

You said it feels good

I said, "I'll give it a try."

Then my mind went dark

We both forgot where your car was parked

Let's just take the train

I'll meet up with the band in the morning

Bad actors with bad habits

Some sad singers they just play tragic

And the phone's ringing and the van's leaving

Let's just keep touching; let's just keep... keep singing...

I want a lover I don't have to love

I want a boy who's so drunk he doesn't talk

Where's the kid with the chemicals?

I've got a hunger and I can't seem to get full

I need some meaning I can memorize

The kind I have always seems to slip my mind

But you, but you...

You write such pretty words

But life's no storybook

Love's an excuse to get hurt

And to hurt.

Do you like to hurt?

I do, I do

Then hurt me... [x10]